Once in a while along comes a little something to trigger a thought, or a blog. We got a puppy last week, he is 8 months old and needed a new home, I bought him for my wife, he is really cute. The same day he arrived she went out shopping, a bed, food, toys, chews, yesterday more food, dentasticks, proper doggy bowls, one week on she is out again, waterproof coat, brush, retractable lead, portable cage etc, this doggy is fully accessorised now. Friends have bought him presents too!!!!!!

Yesterday I was looking at our local paper, online in a brief respite from repeated dog walking trips. A banner ad showed a cool mountain bike, I need a new one, nice spec plus lots of FREE extras as an incentive, today whilst doggy walking a guy on a mountain bike passed me on a relatively flat section of road in the country lanes around where I live. He had all the gear, the clothes, the helmet, his mountain bike was fully accessorised like the puppy on my lead. He was in too high a gear and his bike had rear suspension. The rear suspension will absorb about 10 to 15% of the energy he is putting into moving his bike forward, so he is leaking efficiency and being in the wrong gear will not help his cause either, but damn he looked the part.

Am I knocking others without looking at myself? No not really, we all like things, accessories, gadgets, none of the above are harmful to others so live and let live. But there are loads of stuff out there we do not need but want and I am not going there, most of this stuff is innocuous, doggy waterproof coats, lycra cycling shorts, we can all think of something along that line. BUT, and here I go, there are some products on the market that just make me think no, NO in capitals, NO screaming off the page at you in bold underlined italic capitals in 48 point characters.

Such a thing are the, adverts now circulating, anti rape gloves. Lord (remember I am an atheist) give me strength.

Now I am all for people having the right to defend themselves from any unwanted attention, be that violence (mental/physical/sexual) or political oppression, hate crime you name it. My thoughts are live your life and let others live theirs. However, I am male and of the alpha persuasion, I have a mother, aunts, sister, wife, daughters, friends who are female and I feel incredibly protective towards them all, I know that is not politically correct but touch someone I love and I will come after you. Whilst male rape is either increasing or being reported more, when we talk about rape we mostly relate to male raping female, am I wrong? For now stick with the obvious.

So for the record I really like sex, the best sex is two people who really want to do it with one another, other types of sex are available, and they go for it and enjoy the hell out of one another however they see fit. I cannot envisage how certain other types of sex are enjoyable as they are too different from what I like for me to do so. No examples necessary if you get my drift. But raping someone is so off the scale it is untrue, I can see how it works but could never reconcile understanding to anything approaching acceptance. If I achieve nothing else in life if I help one women to prevent a rape or other sexual attach I will be happy. Teaching self defence is more a mission than a job.

So where is the link with the puppy, the bicycle and the anti rape glove? Well it is here because you buy a puppy I sell you all the accessories, I sell you a bike I sell you all the accessories, I sell you a ….. Hold on nobody sells rape! No rape just happens but people sell fear and fear sells products. The advertising that comes with these gloves may well be gospel, I am not saying it is not but I have a healthy distrust of advertising blurb generally. Just to be clear I am not attacking the product, merely the idea that this kind of product has any actual use value. If it was just as simple as wearing a special pair of gloves, marketed as anti rape but classed as adapted weapons in the UK, wouldn’t that be super, yes indeed. But it is not, it is dangerous bulshit to suggest that this or any other device can protect women from rape, carry a knife a sharpened screwdriver, a home made shank, each of these will not protect you from rape either, because sticking them into another human being, when they are in sexual distance of you (Lt Col Dave Grossman, ‘On Killing’), is not that easy. Much easier to just gore somebody a bit though, surely, and that is the thing, no it isn’t. To be fair the inventor and seller acknowledges the glove may not work, well whoopee woo woo, so what is the point? A glove with spikes in the palm designed to gouge into the flesh of an attacker, cannot be used by the attacker himself, unless he becomes little Miss Vulnerable and buys a pair, or makes a pair, remember some of the ‘fun’ is in the preparation. But it will provide evidence, well once again whoopee woo woo from the slab in the morgue where you ended up after gouging the face of the rapist, yes he absolutely deserved it, tuned him into a murderer (I am not advocating not fighting back, just not that there is any one definite way to do it that works), but just rake his flesh to provide evidence, FFS.

Of course, wearing these gloves will neither eliminate the freeze when a person is attacked, prevent a massive punch rendering you semi conscious, and they do not provide an invisibility cloak or stay safe pass if you to work in the most dangerous environments, walk home alone through deserted crime ridden areas at night, get off your head intoxicated etc etc. ZZZZZZZZZZZZ

And all just a pair of gloves, anti rape wonder gloves. This is not the worst idea someone has come up with and will not take off, the vulnerable and scared may purchase them and you could argue that confirms their status in society as prey, but for me it is one more duff product trading on peoples fears. You can easily accessorise your puppy and your bike, but not out of a rape, wrong place, wrong time, wrong profile and the gloves, well, they will still be gloves.


In the interest of balance and that alone here is the ad, make your own mind up.